The world is inhabited by a vast array of people, all from different walks of life and every one of them has fought some sort of battle; no one is exempt from the fact that life comes with its ups and downs. Every one has his or her own way of dealing with things.Some people chose to put their emotions into writing, while others express themselves better by blaring music from their guitar. However, sometimes the methods people chose to deal with things isn’t quite as apparent as others. For instance, one might put up this wall around themselves blocking people out of their lives to prevent themselves from getting hurt. It’s a sad thing to witness, but it’s very real.
A few days ago I was called weak because of the way I chose to deal with things. For a little while, this really bothered me. I’ve always seen myself as a pretty strong person, rolling with the punches that life has thrown at me. But what if that person was right? What if I am just a silly little girl because I chose to see the bright side of things?
I decided to further evaluate myself.
My stepmother Kim, who passed away several years ago, used to tell me “Emotions are a mental thing; you chose how you feel. If you’re faced with something tough, don’t dwell on it. Deal with it and get over it. Why be sad when you could use your energy for something more useful, like smiling?” Ever since then, whenever something bad comes my way, that’s what I do: Smile. I could sit in my room being miserable all day long, but I would be missing out on wonderful things and all the wonderful people in my life. I choose to see the silver lining to every cloud, and not just the big, fluffy, white ones.
Does this make me a weak person? Does this make me childish? Should I push people away in order to keep myself safe from harm?
No.
I’ve been hurt a lot in my life. I’ve felt sadness more than a lot of people. I know what it’s like to lose everyone and everything you love. But you know what? I would do it all over again. I’ve met so many beautiful people in my life, each and every one of them making me a better person. I’ve learned something from all of them, whether it was how I needed to change myself for the better or just giving myself the reaffirmation I needed that I am doing what’s best for me.
So this is to you. I would like to thank you for showing me exactly the person I don’t want to be. Thank you for helping me believe in myself again. Sometimes people need to be shattered so they can become reacquainted with the pieces of themselves again. I did that, put myself together again, and I’m pleased to say that I wouldn’t change who I am for anything.
I am happy.
I can deal with things.
I am strong.
